Marriage is one of the most important institutions in Islam. It is considered half of one’s faith, a way to build families, and a source of peace and blessings. But before marriage, many cultures have adopted the practice of engagement. This raises a common question: Is engagement in Islam right or wrong?
In this blog, we will explore the meaning of engagement in Islam, what Islamic scholars say about it, and how it should be approached according to Islamic teachings.
Understanding Engagement in Islam
Engagement (known as khitbah in Arabic) is the formal proposal of marriage where a man expresses his intention to marry a woman, and her family agrees. It is not a marriage contract (Nikah) but rather a promise that both families are willing to proceed towards marriage in the near future.
In simple terms:
- Engagement is a step before marriage, not the marriage itself.
- It is a mutual agreement and an announcement of intention.
- It does not give the couple the rights of a husband and wife.
- Engagement is not binding like nikah. Either party may step back if necessary.
- The couple is still considered non-mahram (strangers) to each other until nikah.
- Free mixing, physical contact, or intimate relations are not allowed before marriage.
- An engaged couple cannot live together or behave like husband and wife.
- Exchange of rings, parties, and celebrations are cultural practices, not Islamic requirements.
- Engagement does not make divorce necessary if it is broken, since no nikah was performed.
- 1. Perform the proposal in a respectful and modest manner.
- 2. Ensure both families agree willingly.
- 3. Avoid extravagant celebrations or un-Islamic customs.
- 4. Remember that engagement is only a promise, not a permanent bond.
- 5. Move towards nikah as soon as possible, avoiding unnecessary delays.
Is Engagement Allowed in Islam?
Yes, engagement is permissible in Islam as long as it is done with the right intentions and within the limits of Shariah. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) encouraged Muslims to propose marriage in a respectful and halal manner.
However, it is important to remember:
Therefore, engagement in Islam is allowed, but it must remain a formal promise rather than an excuse for impermissible relationships.
Common Misunderstandings About Engagement
Many people confuse engagement with marriage. In reality:
Islam keeps the concept of engagement simple — a respectful announcement of intention and nothing more.
How Should Engagement Be Done in Islam?
To keep engagement halal and blessed, Muslims should: